Motherhood is LOVE

Mother’s day thoughts…

A child’s first teacher is its mother.  – Peng Liyuan

Mother’s Day. Is it yet another hallmark holiday? Don’t get me wrong. I am so glad that we as a society are reminded to take a moment to stop, reflect and recognize those women who have spent so much time, effort and love towards us. The adventures that motherhood has brought into my life have been transformative. I also absolutely adore all the cards and breakfasts that my little ones and my husband prepare for me with so much care on this day. I too enjoy spending time with my own mother, honoring all her sacrifices and showing my love. To think of all the wonderful moments lived as a mother  brings tears of happiness to my eyes just. It is just that this post has been so difficult for me to write. I pondered for a while on the why… I have so many great things to say about mothers, about the blessings that motherhood have brought into my life… Why can’t I write?!  Even after writing most of what you will soon read, I had my doubts about posting it. Then my six years old came and asked me- “mamá, why do some of your friends not have kids? Does that mean they do not want to? Do you think they are sad on Mother’s Day? We should send them a card or visit.” It confirmed that I should share these usual Mother’s Day thoughts.

At first, I thought about all the nice and pretty things that I could say about the meaning of the word “Mother” or “Mom”. I debated sharing some of my most cherished moments with my own mother, grandmothers and daughters. Even great memories with my mother-in-law, or how much care my aunts and cousins have shown towards me and my loved ones. But while I decided what to write on this post, all I could think of were the years when I suffered my miscarriages (yes, I had several). All those Mother’s Day celebrations that I quietly celebrated with friends and family while suffering inside that desire of celebrating some day with my own child. It reminded me of the moment I realized that I did not need a child to be happy and then a year after celebrating with my own baby in arms. What a blessing! I reflected on the friends that have not been able to have a child of their own; of the ones that desire to adopt and have encountered the most unsettling circumstances to be able to pour out the love they carry.  Of the mothers that have lost their kids. It also reminds me of growth, of messiness, of imperfection.  Mostly, it reminds me of learning. That quote that the “Chinese first lady” Peng Liyuan said – A child’s first teacher is its mother.  Well, that is profound when we come to think of it. The future of our world, of humanity rests with mothers. The impact a mother makes in one person’s life could be transformative. By no means do I believe that our personal future is based on where and when we were born, but it surely impacts a life.

My family and I have been involved for years with a shelter for boys in Puerto Rico. Perhaps being so close to their stories is the reason why I decided to provide this perspective on this celebration. The boys sheltered have been removed from their homes for many reasons, most because of physical and emotional abuse or drug problems. Some were homeless and raised by older siblings; the streets, a bridge or an empty office space were their homes.  The shelter has been blessed to have many donors, churches and volunteers that make sure that these children have education and life experiences that (in all honesty) some middle class families can’t even afford to provide their own children. We are grateful to see them enjoy all these trips and visits from public figures. But…on Mother’s Day… Think about your own family celebration. Would you trade a beach trip or a trip to Disney for a day with your mom or your own child?  Maybe you would, well that’s your choice. I wouldn’t. I still miss both of my grandmother’s and it has been years since they passed. It still saddens me to think of my unborn babies that I never got to really hold and see grow up.   I cherish the moments I enjoy with the strong females I share in my family. Thinking of the boys’ day makes me reflect… I think and value all the women that along with their own families share their time with these young men as an example of the possibilities of a brighter future.

I have also been influenced in my life by women that were not able to become mothers. Some of my best friends were never able or decided not to have a child. These women have taught me, my girls and others so much about life.  So, I guess that I will be talking about the meaning of this day’s celebration after all but with a new twist.

Perspective. That’s the word I want us to think about as we approach this family celebration.

Before you lose it when the kids are running around while you try to capture the “perfect” picture of this year’s Mother’s Day celebration, recall the perspective I present to you. Be grateful for what you have.  For those ladies mourning a child, for those of you living with the desire of becoming a mom-please remember how wonderful you are. Remember that your courage impacts many lives. Allow yourself to be loved and cared for today. Enjoy it with people that truly care about you. Never forget that God loves you always.

This week I want to value, cherish and appreciate every moment I have with those female figures in my life. I want to be grateful for the blessing of having little hands hugging me. I want to share the love, compassion and understanding with those that are missing the female figures in their lives. I strive to comfort a mother that grieves. We all enjoy gifts and the meaning behind it, but the best gifts are the ones that we can’t put a price tag on- your time and your presence.

Be a teacher to those around you and set the bar high. Live, Love & Inspire. After all, Motherhood is LOVE.

To all women on this day and always – Embrace the imperfectly perfect YOU! Happy Day!!!

***Here is an idea of a very thoughtful gift. I’ve been working on one for a year now, but it is not quite ready to be gifted. Click on to check it out.

Letters for my mom